Sometimes I imagine being the headstrong yet adorable companion to Dr Who. I would get in the time machine and go back to when Ollie Twist was owner-building this farmhouse in the 1930's. He would be sitting out the back of his shed down the back playing his clarinet, an enviably SMALL instrument.
Apparently he was a congenial and open minded man so he would greet me happily enough once over the initial surprise at the appearance of a police box in his paddock.
Then after being introduced I'd have a stern word with Ollie.
"Ollie", I'd say, "There are a few things you need to change when you set about building this house of yours as it will one day be mine. I would appreciate you making the hallway twice as wide so I can have a couple of dressers with storage and lovely vinaigrettes on them."
After explaining the vinaigrette principle, I would go on to politely request that he also make the sun room twice as wide so we could fit more people out there and a table and chairs. We used to have them out there till the chillun got too long to get in and out of the chairs and the Big Fella moved it around without permission while I was at the footy one day. Yes, we embrace role reversal here.
"Also Ollie, I would also like the subdivision of the farm to be just a little wider on the eastern side so we can keep the pair of ancient poinciana trees together and while you're on that concreting craze out the side could you lay a slab in the big empty room that could be a great studio if it had a floor?"
"And one more thing, Ollie," I'd ask, as I followed the Doctor back into the Tardis. "Could you please make the house just a metre higher so I can build in underneath with plenty of light and no expensive house lifting which is very much the thing in this part of Australia in about eighty years time. Think what a visionary you would be!"
|The door stays!|
In the meantime I have taken out my house lifting frustrations on the doll house with castors I bought about eight years ago. All things come to those who wait. At least the Noahs won't get wet feet in the next big flood.