Thursday, November 29, 2012


On the way to the doctor I noticed there was a spectacular storm looming. Strange mushrooms of humid, steamy air were pluming in the sky. So Brisbane, so November.

I like shapely clouds. One day I would like to study them and work out how to paint them well so I could have a huge painting of them over our bed. The Big fella has a friend who is a renowned painter of clouds. Perhaps we could commission him.

On arriving at the doctor I was pleased to see that her well stocked waiting room had some new Home Beautifuls. Being the loveliest female doctor of breastage she does NOT stock Marie Claires and Vogues full of strangely elongated women with perfect breastage for the real women in the waiting room to be traumatised by.

My doctor's name is Jenny. I sometimes find myself calling her "my Jenny" but then I sound a bit like Forrest, Forrest Gump.

It was fortuitous finding the Home Beautiful for it also reminded me that another storm is looming. That would be Christmas folks. The image below from the H.B. reminds me of how Christmas will never look at our place.

.We NEVER wear long sleeved ironed shirts. It's too hot.

.We don't have handbag dogs and if we did we would not dress them in frocks and Santa hats and cuddle them at table. It is too hot.

.We do not have tablescapes of delicate flowers and light, dainty know why, don't you?

.We don't use real crockery for the chillun and the glassware is non-matching. There are too many of us. We don't smile politely while one family member makes a light clearly enunciated comment. We all speak simultaneously and loudly and participate in multiple conversations at a time.

.We do not have matching white paper lantern things.

.We do not tie ribbons around our napkins. They are in a packet.

.We never have dewy complexions but are ruddy, sweaty and salty /chlorinated.

.We do not have immaculately coiffed hairstyles but messy hair which are also sweaty and salty/ chlorinated.  (Some of us have considerably less than we did last year. What was I thinking? It must have been too hot!)

.We DO have a handsome white haired grandad. We suspect he likes to turn off his hearing aid.

Here's one we prepared earlier for comparison.
This is not the full contingent. It is about half of them. 
If it's not chaotic, it's not Christmas.
After late lunch, when the kids are swum ragged, they all lie down to watch the High School Spectacular or something else Grandma has taped for them to fall asleep in front of and the grown ups laugh and chatter and tipple till late over the leftovers.
I dread it and love it equally. 

We are one but we are many...


  1. Thank god you don't have those dressed-up dogs!

    1. 'Tis a travisty. Dressed up babies can be worse in vile summer heat when their fun parents put their sweaty little bodies in felt and faux fur hats. Santa wears flip flops in Australia!

  2. And I thought my family was big!!!

    Those poor little pooches ... what comes over some people?!

  3. I'd love an enormous painting of clouds above my bed too. Maybe when you've practised I will commission YOU to paint me one!

    Christmas here? Well I've just heard from one of my sister's (the one with delicious funy little kids) that no, they don't want to come to ours for Christmas this year - they just want a quiet one at home. Very disappointed, it's just not the same without little-ies.

    We did (well the girls did) dress up our pooch in a doggy Father Christmas costume once. For five minutes. x

  4. Your family is huge! Sounds like fun. Our Christmas is generally a smaller affair (although growing in numbers each year, which is fun). It's at our place this year - it will be the start of the post Christmas lunch swim tradition for us.

  5. Your Christmas looks fun. I've always yearned for a large family but that may have been 'cos I watched The Waltons on TV too much.

  6. Wow looks like fun. We also have a large crowd for Christmas also. I have 4 kids and my sister has 5 we are a big bunch too. I live in New York and it is freezing here. Can you tell me what "Santa " wears there??? Here he wears a big red and white heavy fuzzy suit.

  7. Sigh.
    Not a cracker in sight.
    I love clouds as well.
    I can still remember my first flight and being amazed at the beauty of clouds around and below the plane.
    It was a long time ago.
    The Noahs were there that's how long ago it is.

  8. Hee Haw! It looks like so much fun. Wish I had a big family. You Aussies!


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